The concept of well-being is extraordinary to me. In the dictionary, it is defined as a state of being good, healthy, or comfortable. But it can include a wide range of areas in our lives, can’t it? There is mental well-being, characterized by clear, understandable thoughts and ideas, plans to follow through, good habits of self-care, self-talk, and creative solutions to problems. Then there is emotional well-being: the ability to recognize what we are feeling when it arises, including knowledge of our own inner landscape and the temporary nature of most emotions. Physical well-being results from feeling naturally comfortable in our own skin and having a sense of health, paying attention to our body’s signals of comfort and discomfort, and making healthy choices. Financial well-being is achieved not only by having your finances in order, but also by understanding your relationship with money, being aware of how money flows, and discovering your highest purpose in relation to your career path, values, and beliefs.
There is a common vein running through all these types of wellbeing—knowing who you really are. The better you know yourself, the more you will be inclined to increase your own well-being in all areas.
So, who are you? This is the big question that underlies healing, growing, improving, and finding purpose and happiness in our lives. A sense of well-being is a deep, continuous, and ever-present upwelling of joy that we can uncover by discovering who we truly are.
We’ve all grown up being told who and what we are by our family, friends, coworkers, and teachers, all of whom see us in a certain way. But what if we are something so much grander, with gifts and a depth that others could only guess at?
Looking inward hasn’t been popular in the West, and we seem to have built up defenses against it. Think about the times you may be acting or speaking in a way that isn’t your authentic self—pushing your real desires, dreams, and hopes to the side. It takes a lot of energy to be someone we are not. We may go through life trying to be who we think we are supposed to be. Let’s give being who you really, really are a chance. When you are in a state that is true to yourself, you feel more energy and have that sense of well-being.
Ways to begin fostering a sense of well-being:
Mentally:
1) Become aware of your self-talk
We all tell stories to ourselves all day long, and 90% of the thoughts are the same ones we had yesterday! Begin observing your thoughts. You are not your thoughts.
Catch yourself when you begin to judge, complain, or say self-defeating things to yourself. Ask yourself, “Is this true?”
2) Spend some time alone every day, in prayer, meditation, or just out in nature. Connect to your inner self; ask yourself, “Who am I?” You may not get an answer, but it is good to begin this exploration. You will be becoming more aware of the choices you have to be this way or that.
Physically:
1) Begin listening to the messages your body is continually sending: hungry, full, tired, headache, etc. We have become so outward-focused that we tend to work through exhaustion, eat past full, stay up past tired, and ignore that oncoming headache. Listen and take appropriate action. If you start to get a headache, swiftly switch to an activity, thought, or focus that pleases you, even if only for ten minutes. It is incredible how this simple advice can ward off pain. Go to sleep when you are tired and be mindful of how your belly feels while eating, so you stop as soon as you near feeling full.
2) Move. Walk more; take the stairs, park away from the building. Stretch like a cat when you wake up and remember the blissful feeling you had as a child playing outside, running, and swinging. Find activities that give you a sense of comfort in your own skin.
Financially:
1) Take the quiz on my site to see where you fall on the levels of money consciousness. Then really look at the level you are transitioning to and think about what that next level means to you. What would your next logical step be? Can you imagine being comfortable on that higher level of knowledge and understanding? What information is necessary to enable you to move on up the scale?
2) Financial housekeeping: Clean out all old, unnecessary statements. Organize your accounts, total your assets and debts. Create a plan to pay yourself first—set up a savings account where you can track your balance as it grows. Pay down the debts, starting with the one with the highest interest rate. Identify aspects of your financial situation that are positive and build upon them. For example, if you are contributing to your company’s employee retirement plan, raise that contribution a little. And pat yourself on the back. It is high on the money map to embrace your current situation, acknowledge that you did the best you could in the past, and move forward with the intention to truly prosper.
Don’t worry that you have to do this all at once. Pick an idea or two in each category that resonates with you, and start there. Read uplifting books and articles. Do things that make you feel good! Happiness comes from inside.