In Appreciation of Who You Are

There she was, sitting at the very back of the room; a beautiful woman with neat, white flowing hair, nodding and smiling as I spoke, as if to say, yes, darling, that’s right.

There is usually such a woman in the back of the room when I give a public talk! It is mysterious yet quite welcome. My eyes gravitate to this sort of archetypal woman over and over again. And with the rush of people after the talk, I look and she is gone. She was at the cruise in Alaska, with an air of quiet wisdom. I was enamored with her energy of adventurousness and joyful sense of self. I want to be like her as I grow older, gracefully wearing my age, appreciating every line on my face, wrapping my body in colorful, attractive clothing, and moving through life with elegance. Around her one would feel safe, understood, approved of, and aided if need be. She’s not loud or calling attention to herself. I imagine her slipping in and out of people’s lives being of tremendous service, yet not looking for celebrity or adulation.

Understanding this archetype’s importance in my life gives me insights into my own personality, purpose and uniqueness. Perhaps, for me, this symbolizes a possible future self. And discovering yours will do this for you.

Over the last 100 or so years our Western culture has held high the merits of being an extravert. From Dale Carnegie to Tony Robbins we have taken the message of being bold, outspoken, and action oriented to be the ideal in today’s competitive work world.  Make your self noticed, be charming, garner attention, and act commanding.

At the same time the introvert, those who happen to listen more to their inner voice than the world stage, were seen as lacking. The school system has often tried to force the quiet ones into team activities to bring them out. Even the psychological community seemed to miss the treasures that lie within these individuals, preferring everyone be outgoing.

We are now learning that these ‘creatives’ are integral to our society going forward. These are the Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Warren Buffets, even Einsteins and many other unassuming leaders in every industry from manufacturing, services, self-growth and education who value their solitary time and go out to speak only because it is necessary to fulfill their purpose. The creatives are becoming more noticeable in our culture because of media and technology, (which they had a heavy hand in creating by the way).

Looking back I now see why–when I entered the business world, becoming a stock broker barely over 30, trying to be like the gregarious, talkative men in our office–I felt so stressed. I was an introvert wearing the mask of an extravert. I now see why I felt so exhausted by the end of the week. I was pushing myself out of my natural leanings, using up vast amounts of energy making my normally quiet self perform as I thought was expected.

Eventually I created my own business with my own tempo and environment, so prosperity and purpose could easily find me. The clients I attract now are those who understand what I offer them and I understand what they want. They are my tribe.

Introverts need more time alone to recharge. They become very productive and innovative when they are left to their own timeline of purpose. Introverted isn’t being shy, though some are. More often they are quite socially competent, just more inner focused.

And now I know why the quiet women of wisdom catch my attention. This is my ideal, where it feels natural to embrace and hopefully become. Through my self-education I somehow took in the message to be something else.

Knowing who you really are can be as simple as noticing that reappearing archetype in your life; the one who stands out to you like a beacon. And there you will find your prosperity and purpose.

© copyright 2012 Kasey Claytor

7 thoughts on “In Appreciation of Who You Are”

  1. Dear Kasey,
    In the few months I have been receiving your messages, I have slowly begun to view prosperity in a new light. I have realized that I have a fear of money or perhaps a fear of lack of money. I am only beginning to understand what that means. I never imagined that money has a spiritual dimension. Money, I was taught, is the root of all evil. I still have much to learn. I believe you appeared on my path because I am ready to understand, receive and pass on prosperity. Thank you for introducing me to the spiritual path that prosperity can be.

    1. I am very happy to hear about your insights Paula! As an advisor friend of mine says, “It’s not about the Money!” You are on the right track. It ultimately comes down to self-love, self-care and allowing our full wellbeing, which includes financial ease! Much success to you.

  2. Dear Casey,
    I like to envision myself as that woman in the back of the room. Yet I also see the woman that you are as me as well. But here I am just being quiet and managing my life on the small amounts of money I have been trained to work with. My inner life is rich, my outer not so much. I have been listening to you for 3 years now via email and appreciate all you have to say. But I have a fear of putting myself out there to practice what I have learned. By the way the quote is: The LOVE OF money is the root of evil. Perhaps the opposite is also true. I laugh at my thoughts that someday I will win the lottery!
    Sincerely, Pam

    1. Thanks for the comments Pam. We are all connected and you are those women, as I am. Your outer world will match your inner world when you give yourself permission. You don’t have to ‘put yourself out there’, all you have to do is express yourself in ways you are comfortable doing. It will all unfold with the joy in that.

    2. Hi Pam,
      Yes, the actual quote is, “The love of money is the root of all evil.” I was simply relating what I was taught, not the full quote. Thanks for your response. Paula

  3. WOW! I found it very inspiring and thought provoking.
    I’m glad I took the time to read it and I thank you for composing it.
    Society needs the introverts to balance the extroverts. I can honestly
    say, I’m happy
    being one of the “quiet ones” and I won’t degrade myself for it.

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